alt_charlie (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
alt_charlie) wrote2013-02-20 11:49 pm
alt_charlie) wrote2013-02-20 11:49 pm
Order Only Private Message to Bill Weasley
I think I've finally put my finger on why I've been so upset lately. And so quiet, because it's the kind of thing that never sounds right outside your own head.
I can't get over what Poppy did. For Dolohov. Healing one of them, with a potion I riskedmy life all of our lives the whole Order, really a lot of things to get her the ingredients for.
I understand why she did it. More thanMum some people in the Order might, really: I know that when you're in the middle of an emergency, you do what you need to do, and you deal with the consequences later. I've done it myself. But when we do it here, it's accepting the risk of injury in order to heal an injured dragon, things like that. Not using an unreplaceable resource to save the life of someone who's chosen to do horrible things. Someone who's trying to coax children into thinking those horrible things are right and just.
I've been reading some of the journals of the Jr Aux lately, to try to get a feel for who they are and who they could be in a few years: did you see what he said to Parkinson tonight? Ugh. I wish I could argue with him in public. I wish I could show them that not everyone falls for his smarmy rationalisations. I wish I could tear off that pleasant mask and show everyone the monster that lives underneath it. For all of them, really, but especially for him, because he makes it all sound so neat and logical and romantic and right, and really it's that he's warping the world around those kids until they might not be able to tell what right even is anymore.
I can't blame Poppy for saving him in the heat of the moment. But I'm upset that he was saved. If that makes any sense. (It probably doesn't.) And I don't want to say anything to her about it, because I know she's probably still in pieces about having done it and I don't want to make it worse for her.
Ugh.
Let's talk about something that doesn't have even a hint of awful in it. Might have to go hunting for a topic, but, yeah. I think I need something nice for a while. I carved a pawn tonight, out of pear wood. It's nowhere near as good as the ones in the set I traded Greg for, for Ron's Christmas gift -- it's lopsided and doesn't sit straight when you set it down -- but Greg says it's a good start, at least.
Chess? Your turn to start us off.
I can't get over what Poppy did. For Dolohov. Healing one of them, with a potion I risked
I understand why she did it. More than
I've been reading some of the journals of the Jr Aux lately, to try to get a feel for who they are and who they could be in a few years: did you see what he said to Parkinson tonight? Ugh. I wish I could argue with him in public. I wish I could show them that not everyone falls for his smarmy rationalisations. I wish I could tear off that pleasant mask and show everyone the monster that lives underneath it. For all of them, really, but especially for him, because he makes it all sound so neat and logical and romantic and right, and really it's that he's warping the world around those kids until they might not be able to tell what right even is anymore.
I can't blame Poppy for saving him in the heat of the moment. But I'm upset that he was saved. If that makes any sense. (It probably doesn't.) And I don't want to say anything to her about it, because I know she's probably still in pieces about having done it and I don't want to make it worse for her.
Ugh.
Let's talk about something that doesn't have even a hint of awful in it. Might have to go hunting for a topic, but, yeah. I think I need something nice for a while. I carved a pawn tonight, out of pear wood. It's nowhere near as good as the ones in the set I traded Greg for, for Ron's Christmas gift -- it's lopsided and doesn't sit straight when you set it down -- but Greg says it's a good start, at least.
Chess? Your turn to start us off.