alt_charlie: (all right then)
alt_charlie ([personal profile] alt_charlie) wrote 2014-07-07 07:16 am (UTC)

Re: Private message to Alice

Oh, damn it, now you've gone and gotten me all sniffly.

But, well, thank you. It's good to hear that kind of vote of confidence from someone else I guess. I mean, I think I'll be all right at the job -- and I certainly had an excellent role model -- but it's the sort of thing I can't really let myself think of too much, or let myself think about all the details, because every time I do I start to get this swimmy-headed feeling. There's just so much.

I know I was the one to say we shouldn't tell Mum, at least not at first, not until things are a little more settled and we figure out a way to tell her that won't leave her thinking Tonks and I are, I dunno, like her and Dad were. And I don't want to put Tonks through the pressure of Mum pinning all her hopes on her about grandchildren and all. But I'm starting to wish, just a little, that I could talk to her about it. Mum, I mean. And I know that if I told Tonks it was important to me, she'd say yeah, go ahead, and we'd figure out a way to do it that wouldn't be awful, but I don't want to toss that into the mix in the middle of, you know, making a new person. Not when it's not what we agreed to.

But I can't help thinking of Mum getting pregnant with Ginny in the midst of a war, and wondering what she felt. And how scared she was, for all of us. And then I think of Percy again, and ... yeah.

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