I think it sounds lovely, actually. A bit formal, but not too stilted. Maybe take out the "So, so terrible", though, that sentence does sound a little like you're overdoing it, and change "being sent away" to something a bit more euphemistic like "Mr Malfoy's misfortune" or some such?
And not a hamper, they're probably drowning in them -- Percy used to talk about the kind of things people used to send the Malfoys for Christmas and I can only imagine it's worse for a death in the family. Maybe check the obituary again? I only glanced at it, but don't people usually say something about where to send donations instead of flowers? Not that Narcissa would care that you sent something, but not sending one would probably be a breech of that pureblood etiquette they care so much about.
And I like you because you're not a perfect lamb, you know. More interesting that way. I was joking about the hexing part, but in all seriousness, if you do feel like getting shouty with someone, or just want a shoulder to lean against or someone to piss and moan to, I will be at your service at any hour of night or day, luv. I've never thought it was right that it takes two to tango but then the woman gets stuck with nine months of baking the baby before it's ready to join the rest of us. I can't do that part, but I can do anything else you need or want me to.
(Merlin's manky underpants, we're making a person. Still can't wrap my head around it. I know you've been down this road before, but it's all new to me!)
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Date: 2014-06-30 11:40 pm (UTC)And not a hamper, they're probably drowning in them -- Percy used to talk about the kind of things people used to send the Malfoys for Christmas and I can only imagine it's worse for a death in the family. Maybe check the obituary again? I only glanced at it, but don't people usually say something about where to send donations instead of flowers? Not that Narcissa would care that you sent something, but not sending one would probably be a breech of that pureblood etiquette they care so much about.
And I like you because you're not a perfect lamb, you know. More interesting that way. I was joking about the hexing part, but in all seriousness, if you do feel like getting shouty with someone, or just want a shoulder to lean against or someone to piss and moan to, I will be at your service at any hour of night or day, luv. I've never thought it was right that it takes two to tango but then the woman gets stuck with nine months of baking the baby before it's ready to join the rest of us. I can't do that part, but I can do anything else you need or want me to.
(Merlin's manky underpants, we're making a person. Still can't wrap my head around it. I know you've been down this road before, but it's all new to me!)